A toxic relationship can truly be damaging, especially when it seems like there is no way out. Harmful relationships can happen to anyone, which means that recognizing the signs when a relationship goes from bad to toxic can help lead to safety and recovery. The first step to getting out of a bad partnership is to recognize the problem for what it is. That’s why we’ve pointed out  five red flags to define a toxic relationship, and discuss strategies for getting out of one.

5 SIGNS OF A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP

1. It’s only momentarily good

To think that toxic relationships have no good moments is a misunderstanding. Certainly, there will be brief highs in a toxic relationship, but that joy does not last. Some relationships begin in the most joyful, euphoric, romantic ways, that it becomes hard to understand why they suddenly took a turn for the worse. The partner may have frequent mood swings, may discourage and bring you down, or blame you for problems. While there are good days, the emotional rollercoaster is a sure sign of a toxic relationship.

2. It’s all about them

Relationships should feel interdependent—each person gives some and takes some. However, toxic relationships are often one-sided. The other person never acknowledges your feelings or respects your opinions. When you fight, they always need to be right. Their ego starts to overwhelm the relationship, and your voice no longer feels valued. A toxic person never considers that they might be contributing to the problem.

3. Blame-giving

Another sign of a toxic relationship is the constant blaming—of making issues your fault. An example might be telling your partner that they hurt your feelings. Instead of acknowledging and validating your emotions, they turn it on you and say that the situation was caused by you. Toxic partners can be very passive aggressive and manipulate the situation against the other person. You may feel worthless or that your opinions are not valuable, but this is simply not the case.

4.You can’t be yourself

Similarly, any relationship that you can’t be yourself in is not healthy. For whatever reason—if your partner puts you down or won’t accept who you are—it’s likely that this is a toxic relationship. Everyone has room to grow, but if you feel like you need to change yourself for that person, it’s time to get out.

5. The relationship is your whole world

Everything is good in moderation. If the relationship is your whole world, your identity, then this is unhealthy. You might feel anxious while you are away from them, or you might always be thinking about what they said about you. However, if the relationship is the only important thing in your life, this can be toxic, especially if the other person is taking advantage of this. Another sign of this happening is the feeling like you are being separated you’re your friends and family. If a relationship has overwhelmed your everyday world, and people are being removed from your life, re-evaluate the relationship.

HOW TO GET HELP FOR A TOXIC RELATIONSHIP

If your relationship meets any of these qualifications, and you’re looking for a way out, there is hope. The first step is acknowledging the problem. Seeking support from friends and family is a good first step. Going to counseling for a toxic relationship can be very helpful, especially if you feel that you do not have a voice with your partner, or you have feelings of fear and anxiety when you try to end the relationship. Talking with a professional can restore your power, make you feel confident in yourself, and give you the tools to exit the relationship safely.

It can be easy to blame yourself in a toxic relationship, but the truth is it’s not your fault. Don’t let negative thoughts rule your life. Stay positive by remembering the things you love about yourself and your life. Recovery is possible.

If you think that you may be involved in a toxic relationship, or don’t know how to get out of one, contact us. In Sight Counseling Connections can be a great resource for anyone who feels beaten down by their relationships. We specialize in restoring power to individuals—to growing confidence. We help give you the skills to accomplish your goals, whether that be exiting a relationship or recovering from a high conflict engagement. Please give us a call to set up a free first consultation. We are on your side.